Any kind of black loafer! Especially with croc finish and silver thingies on. God I wish I was that girl, but I 100% am not. I like thinking about it this way: I want to want to be a loafer-wearer. But I am not going to change myself into being one. Wanting to want something is fun, but you don't want it. It's like thinking "oh boy I really wish I wanted kids so I could relate to my friends more". I don't want kids, I just want to feel closer to my friends. Back to the loafers: I don't actually want loafers, I just want to feel like a cool loafer-wearing-person. Which is fine, but it's not my style :)
This is one I learned this year: pretty dresses. You know, the stereotypically feminine ones—floral prints, figure flattering. I’m only human—I see pretty dress, I like pretty dress. But I know they’re not for me. Thanks for providing the language! “My taste but not my style” as a mantra is absolutely game-changing.
Vintage 501s, worn loose. As a base of an outfit on others they look like perfection to me, chill and classic. On me, they require so much work and even then, I have so many other pants that feel more me. It's such a mind f*ck.
Such a good post! I love looks from the 50s and 60’s. Old Doris Day movies when she wears a dress with a matching coat. Or full skirted dresses cinched at the waist. Ballet flats and kitten heels. Pretty shoes. And gloves. But it’s so not my style. Even if I lived during that time I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t dress that way. I’m much sportier in real life. I wear comfortable, flat shoes (so I can get around quickly and safely) mostly pants so I can move without restriction. I veer masculine (except when it comes to color and cleavage - the boobs are still good.) I guess my style is the anti-girly girl. My taste includes a lot of girly.
White jeans! I love the idea of them and how fresh and summery and classy they look (on others), but every ten years that I commit the error to buy them, I have to let go of them. My gorgeous Tom Ford crisp and white denim has only been allowed out an afternoon; I don’t feel fat or ugly in them - they are just not me.
What a post- a true eye opener for me! Thank you for continuously sharing so much knowledge about fashion and personal style and how to bring the two together without triggering the need to buy new things all the time. I have already learned so much here!
i always snap to when i see very structured wide shoulder, nipped waist suits. I even inherited two from my mom and I just can't deal with them on it is so alien to my being. Also: voluminous multi-colored long goddess dresses like mara hoffman or even some old YSL. I always want them but I can deal with presenting myself in the world like that MAYBE 2 days a year. It's practically a psychoanalysis session to sort through coveting things that do not suit.
Omg this really struck home with me! I love the words that you’ve given this conundrum (taste vs style) - it makes it so much clearer. I sort of instinctively know what works for my life, but the call of the items that aren’t my style still win occasionally. Now I have words to explain to myself why I don’t need the very lady shoes and high maintenance accessories that I love but never wear!!! Case in point: Jil Sander caged kitten heel sandals. I have wanted these for ages, finally bought them and now they’re sitting in my shoe area mocking me with their impractical, dainty heels and narrow, uncomfortable straps. I just don’t wear shoes that I can’t walk 10km in. I will keep them for events, but lesson learnt. I don’t need these types of shoes. They’re my taste, but not my style.
For me it is sneakers in essentially any context other than at work, with scrubs. I love seeing other people wear them with skirts, dresses, wide leg pants - and I always feel an impulse to use them to dress down or be more casual. But I put them on and feel like I'm an alien in my own body.
I hear ya. Sneakers are hard for me too. I have forced myself to be a sneaker person when I travel for work because they are the most practical but i never reach for them otherwise.
Love boho but after spending a lot of money I know it's not for me! Flowy unstructured kimono sleeves are so beautiful but so impractical for real life! Felt ridiculous at work trying to keep my sleeves from knocking everything off my desk! Love this 😀 topic thanks!( also thanks for the sock recommendations, Swedish stocking have the best lacey knee highs!)
And the more honest you are about your plate, the more delicious your style feels."
Perfectly said, Asta! Things that are my taste but not my style: boho, preppy, ruffles, loafers. I can do small elements of these things (if they fall into badass/artsy/joyful) but not head-to-toe. Loafers make my feet look like giant meat-loaf pans.
Any kind of black loafer! Especially with croc finish and silver thingies on. God I wish I was that girl, but I 100% am not. I like thinking about it this way: I want to want to be a loafer-wearer. But I am not going to change myself into being one. Wanting to want something is fun, but you don't want it. It's like thinking "oh boy I really wish I wanted kids so I could relate to my friends more". I don't want kids, I just want to feel closer to my friends. Back to the loafers: I don't actually want loafers, I just want to feel like a cool loafer-wearing-person. Which is fine, but it's not my style :)
Yes, you framed that excellently
So well put! 👏
Oh thank you so much for putting it this way!
Blazers! Love them on everyone else but I don't like them on me
Same! I even love how blazers look on me, but VERY few make me FEEL like I want to wear them….
I had no idea blazers would be a common one!
That’s one of mine too! Also, anything oversized. I just can’t.
Wow, yeah makes sense
Ooh I never noticed you don't wear blazers but OMG you are right!
I'm the same with oversized blazer! Incredible cool on others, but I just feel like I'm drowning.
Totally hear ya
I can’t do blazers casually- I love them when I need to feel instantly “work powerful” but feel so try hard just wearing around town
Another vote for blazers. I’ve been trying to make them work since 7th grade.
Love all of this!!
I’ve now realized my taste and personal style are so different 🫠
Still trying to figure out what I actually like on me
It is such a big unlock!
This is one I learned this year: pretty dresses. You know, the stereotypically feminine ones—floral prints, figure flattering. I’m only human—I see pretty dress, I like pretty dress. But I know they’re not for me. Thanks for providing the language! “My taste but not my style” as a mantra is absolutely game-changing.
Yes I hear you and same for me on those dresses
Vintage 501s, worn loose. As a base of an outfit on others they look like perfection to me, chill and classic. On me, they require so much work and even then, I have so many other pants that feel more me. It's such a mind f*ck.
Exact same with 501s. They are not for me
I love the analogy of the buffet and what you put on your plate. This is a wonderfully crafted and practical piece, nice one!
Thank you!
Such a good post! I love looks from the 50s and 60’s. Old Doris Day movies when she wears a dress with a matching coat. Or full skirted dresses cinched at the waist. Ballet flats and kitten heels. Pretty shoes. And gloves. But it’s so not my style. Even if I lived during that time I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t dress that way. I’m much sportier in real life. I wear comfortable, flat shoes (so I can get around quickly and safely) mostly pants so I can move without restriction. I veer masculine (except when it comes to color and cleavage - the boobs are still good.) I guess my style is the anti-girly girl. My taste includes a lot of girly.
Yes I feel the same on that
White jeans! I love the idea of them and how fresh and summery and classy they look (on others), but every ten years that I commit the error to buy them, I have to let go of them. My gorgeous Tom Ford crisp and white denim has only been allowed out an afternoon; I don’t feel fat or ugly in them - they are just not me.
I feel the same about that one
Me too - I just don’t feel like myself in white jeans either. Plus I immediately spill crap on anything white as soon as I put it on.
Ha, curse of white clothes!
I’m a bit the same! I have a great pair of Frame white barrels and I put them on, and take them off!
Would be the same for me!
What a post- a true eye opener for me! Thank you for continuously sharing so much knowledge about fashion and personal style and how to bring the two together without triggering the need to buy new things all the time. I have already learned so much here!
Thank you so much for reading and the feedback!
i always snap to when i see very structured wide shoulder, nipped waist suits. I even inherited two from my mom and I just can't deal with them on it is so alien to my being. Also: voluminous multi-colored long goddess dresses like mara hoffman or even some old YSL. I always want them but I can deal with presenting myself in the world like that MAYBE 2 days a year. It's practically a psychoanalysis session to sort through coveting things that do not suit.
I feel the exact same on those mara hoffman dresses!
Great post Asta! Great q’s to ask before we hit the ‘ol ‘add to cart’ happiness trap 👍🏻
Thank you so much!
Omg this really struck home with me! I love the words that you’ve given this conundrum (taste vs style) - it makes it so much clearer. I sort of instinctively know what works for my life, but the call of the items that aren’t my style still win occasionally. Now I have words to explain to myself why I don’t need the very lady shoes and high maintenance accessories that I love but never wear!!! Case in point: Jil Sander caged kitten heel sandals. I have wanted these for ages, finally bought them and now they’re sitting in my shoe area mocking me with their impractical, dainty heels and narrow, uncomfortable straps. I just don’t wear shoes that I can’t walk 10km in. I will keep them for events, but lesson learnt. I don’t need these types of shoes. They’re my taste, but not my style.
That's a good example. I got those two and never wore them.
All of this!! i had never made the distinction between taste and style before and this explains it so well! Thanks asta!
Thanks for the feedback!
For me it is sneakers in essentially any context other than at work, with scrubs. I love seeing other people wear them with skirts, dresses, wide leg pants - and I always feel an impulse to use them to dress down or be more casual. But I put them on and feel like I'm an alien in my own body.
I hear ya. Sneakers are hard for me too. I have forced myself to be a sneaker person when I travel for work because they are the most practical but i never reach for them otherwise.
Love boho but after spending a lot of money I know it's not for me! Flowy unstructured kimono sleeves are so beautiful but so impractical for real life! Felt ridiculous at work trying to keep my sleeves from knocking everything off my desk! Love this 😀 topic thanks!( also thanks for the sock recommendations, Swedish stocking have the best lacey knee highs!)
Oh yay for Swedish Stockings! And I hear you on flowy things.
This makes 100% sense to me:
"Taste is everything beautiful at the buffet.
Style is what you actually put on your plate.
And the more honest you are about your plate, the more delicious your style feels."
Perfectly said, Asta! Things that are my taste but not my style: boho, preppy, ruffles, loafers. I can do small elements of these things (if they fall into badass/artsy/joyful) but not head-to-toe. Loafers make my feet look like giant meat-loaf pans.
You are so clear on your list. Love that! Boho is like that for me also. Same for ruffles.